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Joke by JR Hager:
Aliens land and 'thought message' the first person they see:
"Take us to your leader."
Guy, after shitting his pants:
"You mean the 'military complex' 'Obama & big gov.' 'big pharma.' 'FBI' 'CIA' 'FDA' 'DEA' ? .... so many to Choose."
Alien's thought message: "Oh, never mind, we're too early."